you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize