I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
