I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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