Don't make out with my wife yet
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Just pee around me
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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