why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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