thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
