Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize