let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
