Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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