Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
