Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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