so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
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