I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Dignity is for republicans.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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