hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
