No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
