i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Randomize
