Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
