eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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