very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
