ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
