how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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