Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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