please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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