I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
