How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Randomize
