You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
