Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
