But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
