How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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