Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize