So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
