the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
