Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Randomize