Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Randomize
