I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
