I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Randomize
