yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
