we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
The adults are the big ones right?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize