Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
never play flip cup with pint glasses
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Randomize
