You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
Randomize
