We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
