big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
