It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
