Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
