Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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