i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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