Just cropdusted the office
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize