I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Randomize
