whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Dignity is for republicans.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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