Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
My life is pants optional.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
