Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
