So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
