Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
